The #Olympic flame is being flown into the UK. Be cheaper to buy a box of matches from a corner shop in London.

  • I was given extra round peas which is why they rolled across the tablecloth and a spud dropped off my fork and did a bellyflop in the gravy. #

I was given extra round peas which is why they rolled across the tablecloth and a spud dropped off my fork and did a bellyflop in the gravy.

  • Nice without the rain. http://t.co/RwNhAKzH #
  • Lots of mozzies about though. They think I'm dinner. #
  • I have to keep her on the lead otherwise she gets home an hour before me. http://t.co/khtkfE4v #
  • The only place I can hear the stereo properly in 5.1 is from the dogs side of the sofa. This is going to be a battle of wills I can't win. #
  • Actually I think its more a case of any seat I want to sit in is the dogs seat. #

Actually I think its more a case of any seat I want to sit in is the dogs seat.

The only place I can hear the stereo properly in 5.1 is from the dogs side of the sofa. This is going to be a battle of wills I can’t win.

I have to keep her on the lead otherwise she gets home an hour before me. http://t.co/khtkfE4v

Lots of mozzies about though. They think I’m dinner.

Nice without the rain. http://t.co/RwNhAKzH

  • #Hollande — "Austerity can no longer be the only option."
    Interesting. What will Georgy do now? #Eurozone #
  • This rain is driving me MENTAL!!! #
  • 'Horse Watch' to combat #horse related crime being pushed. About time we stopped horses climbing through open windows and pinching our TV's. #
  • I just bought: 'SanDisk microSDHC 32GB Card' by SanDisk via @amazonuk
    Don't know if it's fake or genuine though :) http://t.co/YwhKmC5I #
  • Why do these mobile phone #sims only cost 1p? What am I going to do with £10 worth? Play at being Jack Bauer? #
  • So I have a Samsung galaxy note now. Haven't a clue how to use it. I'm just pressing everything and hoping for the best. #
  • Think I can use this iPod better than the note. #
  • If everybody switched to the same water utility and told the others to fix their pipes I bet they'd soon sort out burst pipes. #
  • BOE Interest rates held!
    Bugger! I'm losing billions on my savings. #
  • Now that you have to remove your underpants what will they do with all those piles of underpants at airports? #
  • Is this another underpants story? Ferrari have apologised to Chinese authorities for leaving landmarks. #
  • Pity that the media and @bbcnews have to reveal so much about the underpants bomber putting him and his family at risk. Just want the scoop #
  • Prime Minister used to sign off emails to Rebekah Brooks with LOL. He thought it meant lots of love till Rebekah told him what it meant.#lol #
  • My ISP Zen is down. Having to use Kindle to reach the world. Cold turkey! #
  • Ah I have internet connection back. Took ages to tweet via kindle but works well. Well done @zeninternet #
  • My dogs taken up the violin ready for the next #bgt #
  • Wish that cackling blackbird would shut up. SHUT UP! Its getting on my beak now. #

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